Location update: New York city; this is "home" again for at least a year after 2 years away.
I've been doing lots of everything between choking on formulas for my stat class and catching up with wonderful people I've missed. One of the best things about life in New York city is that nothing seems unexpected or absurd enough to mention...but this also means that every time I've sat down to write something I've started to doubt that the story is interesting enough for the internet. Real New Yorkers don't seem to blink at anything; maybe my moments of naive amusement are best kept to myself.
Maybe.
Or maybe I'll tell you what I heard on the subway this week and hope you chuckle:
Yelled by a woman waiting board AS the doors are just opening:
"'SCUSE ME"
Conversation between a woman sitting across three seats and a girl standing (not touching the woman at all, really) on a rush-hour subway:
"Can you move? Your ass is touching me."
"Where am I supposed to stand?"
"But your ass is touching me. I don't want your ass touching me."
"It's a crowded train ma'am. It happens."
"Your ass is touching me."
*sigh* "Well, I don't think it is."
"..."
Singing:
"We can talk about Jesus while you wait for your trrrraaaaiiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnn!"
Old man who startled me by tapping my Howard Zinn book as he passed me:
"He was a very. radical. man....But he's usually right."
A girl approaches a group of older women laughing and conversing in a foreign language:
"Excuse me. Can I ask you a strange question?"
Loudest of the women:
"Sure"
Girl:
"I'm trying to break up with my boyfriend. How should I do it?"
Woman:
"Tell him to fuck off."
Girl, before walking away:
"Ok. Thanks."
Woman to her cackling companions:
"Wait...Was she serious?"
This one, admittedly, was above-ground:
Man who really wanted a dance:
"Wait! Where are you going? Don't worry; you can't get pregnant like this! The bow-tie has to come off first!"
And lastly, from a random (since I'm pompous and trendy if I call it "obscure") documentary a friend showed me:
"You always giggle falsely! You're never genuine!"
